Custom Search

19.4.09

Paternal Grandfather and Grandmother stories

What I will be blogging about are someone who are still with us and had already left us. Yes, my A-gong and A-ma stories. *Giggles* It's sometimes great to hear those stories from our parents. See how our origin come about. Sometime ago, there was a prof from China asking which generation I am now in Malaysia. Calculating that I told him I am the third generation. Well, for Chinese tradition, you tend to follow your father side and not the mother side. *smile*

I will start off with my paternal side of the story first.

Agong Origin
A-gong (that's how I called my grandpa) was from Fujian China. He passed away 5-6 years ago.He was 84 that time or older cos A-gong didnt really know when he was born. As you know, in China that time, birthcert hadnt exist yet. It's about 1920s. Wow... that's really long time ago. Well, how does A-Gong get to Malaysia. I just recently found out this story from my dad. Cos I was curious and therefore, I asked. Dad said A-gong came to Malaysia all alone when he was about 12-14 years old. Travelling in the cramp ship for a few days. Penniless. That's sound very miserable. I wonder how he survived the condition that time. I guess our life now is way much much more comfortable than his. Later, he found himself a God-father (from the same province) and started working for him in Setiawan, Perak. I guess life was tough in China so that's why he had to leave his beloved family behind to find a survival outside of China so that he could send some money back. All I know is he had got a sister back in China. He did send money back to China even though he was already old and he still missed them and would like to do his part as a little brother. I guess, people that time have more sense of responsibilities compared to our generation. The relatives in China are mostly policeman or policewoman (that's all I know) - source of info is from my uncles. Ok ok back to the topic. A-Gong work in the estate that time. Tapping rubber. He worked in Perak for a few years before he moved to work in Penang. Then, he moved down south to Johor when he got married with A-ma (grandma). A-Gong was a really handsome young chap. Last time camera is too ex, so he got a drawn potrait. Still hanging in A-ma's house.

A-ma Origin
A-ma came from the same province as A-gong but they didnt know each other that time. A-ma came to Malaysia, specifically Johor with his relatives. I know A-ma stories better cos she will always tell us her stories to my mom and us sometimes. So the stories were first handed. You know what, when people are rich and they know their parents werent around, people will just abuse your kids. Well, that's what happen in the 1920s. The master abuse the maid that kind of thing. The parents thought that it will be way better for A-ma to come to Malaysia with relatives not knowing what lies ahead of her. That's very saddening. However, if A-ma didnt come to Malaysia, I guess I will not be here anyway. Hahhahaha ... Alright back to the story. A-ma was treated as a maid when she was here. She came to Malaysia at about 14-16 years old I think. Life was hard for her. She basically have to take care of housechores like cleaning, cooking, taking care of children, carry water from river for the family uses etc. Those might sound simple but think back it's back in 1920s and machines or tools are not that advance as now. No proper electricity, water and gas. So everything is really down to earth. YOu really have to use firewood to cook your food. During that time, A-ma had to wake up before sun rises and slept before sun set. No shirts for her only pants till the age of 18. Only given leftover meal a day and got beaten up if you do a slightest mistake. All this engraved very deeply into her mind. Even I as a bystander feel so painful for her. I guess if this happen nowadays people will called that abusing. Therefore, our life are still way much better now. Her life only start to get a little bit better after she married to A-Gong. A-ma was really a maiden that time too. Her looks are like those ancient China ladies. Sharp oval face, really authentic asian eyes, small mouth, thin, tall and slender. Really very pretty. Her looks doesnt really change much, just that her hair dropped as the time passes and wrinkles developed. She will be 90 this year and hoping she will have pink of health always. Hope that her health will not deteriot as time goes. Pray for A-ma *wink*

When A-Gong meets A-ma
A
-gong and A-ma didnt get married like us do. It's all about matchmaking and their love are so strong till they are at their old age. I think A-ma still misses A-Gong a lot although he has passed away. They bickered so much but their love is soo deep. I still remembered that when A-Gong was about to leave us forever, the only person he can remember is only A-ma. He was so worried about A-ma and was reluctant to leave. However, when a person time is up you cant really do anything about it. Thinking this back I will see how fragile relationship is nowadays. People walk in and out of relationship sooo easily. Probably life is getting better and people start not to cherish about anything. I dont know. People divorce or break up when problem came. They started to push responsibilities to each other and blaming each other saying it's their fault when problem arises. Rather I think they should solve the problem and not blaming each other. We should accept and say sorry when we are at fault. Overcoming each other shortcomings as we are not a perfect soul. That's should be the way. Sadly, people nowadays always think they are superior beings and have higher expectations on the other half rather than reflecting about themselves. I really envy the relationship between A-Gong and A-ma and do really hope to have a relationship which is really long lasting. Enduring over hardships and love still grow so strong between both of them. Let's reflect what's the love like nowadays. Why cant they be just as strong as theirs? I really wonder.

Life after marriage
Th
e life after marriage wasnt a smooth sailing or happily ever after. Reality is always a cruel situation. Both A-gong and A-ma has to work hard to feed the children at home. Both start off working as rubber tapper at an estate. Then, they started to save money to buy land. Land at the time was cheap but earning wasnt easy. A-gong and A-ma were very thrifty people even until now. It's was like if they earn a penny, it's a must for them to save two. So life wasnt easy for my dad either. Well, that will be dad stories so I shall not say a lot here. Hehehehhehe. During the rubber tapping, A-ma got a few miscarriages and she continued working despite her miscarriage on the spot!!! WHat will we do now? Groaning in pain and crying. Imagine, life was so tough that she didnt even have time to sit down and cry cos there were still children to feed at home. But she was blessed with 6 sons and 3 daughters though. My dad is of course one of them. Hahhahahaha .... Then, from the money they saved, they started to buy lands and other stuff. I do really salute them for their patience and endurance. I think people will strive their best when they are at their worst. If it wasnt because of the poor condition, people will not really appreciate what they have. Sometimes, listening to the old people talking isnt as bad though. You really get to learn a lot through their stories and feel really bless with our current condition that we are in. So never forget the good life that we are all having now in comparison to the time when our ancestor set our foot here. So do you have a story to tell too? *Wink*

3 comments:

João R. said...

Just wanted to say that here (Portugal) our reality wasn't so different for our grandfathers and grandmothers. They had to work very hard to earn each coin ^^

Well, but talking about the good things is that i really agree with you, that today people tend to unsolve problems and prefer to leave and try to get his(her) dream better half, wich eventually can happen but i think its a 1 in a trillion shot...

I think like you said that we should find solutions and be flexible in our relations because maybe that's a way to prove to the other half that we believe in them and can that we can do some personallity changings for them.

I liked your grandparents life story a lot... remembered me a few things!

Kiss Ee Ling *** stay well

Ee Ling said...

I will be writing on the maternal grandparents stories soon. Hehehehe ... then slowly I might intro in my parents and childhood stories too =)

João R. said...

That would be nice ^^ it's good to hear different life experiences. Always teaches us something!

**** Ee Ling

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails